Here is another really helpful article by Anthony E. Wolf about parenting with teens. Here is the intro if you don’t have time for the whole article.
“Every parent knows it’s important to have good communication with their teen – actual conversations with plenty of back and forth. The problem, of course, is that most teenagers don’t like to talk to their parents. And many potentially rich interactions get derailed before they even start. Usually, we’re at fault. We can’t just let them talk. There are far too many important life lessons to impart.”
I know I catch myself often only after my daughter leaves the room frustrated again by my opinions and advice.
I remember when I used to drive the girls on long trips for hockey games and if I would just be quiet and listen I would hear so much about their lives. This is another approach when you are one on one with your teen and instead of giving advice you just reflect what you are hearing briefly and then listen more when your teen keeps talking because we aren’t.